Gluten Free Cookies

The flour: It can be made yourself or purchased from Bob's Red Mill (If you make it yourself it will be a bit  more salty, so I'd recommend cutting back on the amount of salt you add to recipes)

Gluten Free Baking Mix

Substitute this mix cup for cup for wheat flour, except in bread recipes.  Look for xanthan gum next to the specialty flours.

2 1/3	C	Chickpea flour
2/3	C	Cornstarch
¼	C	Sugar
3 1/2	tsp	Xanthan gum
1 1/2	tsp	Salt
1	tsp	Cream of tartar

Combine all ingredients.  Store in an airtight container.

Then the cookie recipe:

Gluten Free Chocolate Chip Cookies

1	C	Canola oil (I used corn oil...going to try coconut next)
¾	C	Sugar
¾	C	Brown sugar
2		Eggs
1	tsp	Vanilla
2 1/3	C	Gluten free baking mix
1	tsp	Baking soda
1	tsp	Salt
2	C	Chocolate chips (or my fave - half butterscotch, half chocolate) It calls for 2...I used 1.5 cups and it was still a LOT. Will do 1 1/4 next time...

1. Preheat oven to 350F.  Grease a baking sheet.
2. Combine oil and sugar in large bowl and beat with mixer on medium-high speed.  Add eggs, one at a time, mixing until creamy.  Add vanilla.
3. Reduce speed to low and gradually add baking mix, baking soda and salt.  Stir in chocolate chips.
4. Drop cookies by tablespoon only baking sheet.  Flatten slightly.
5. Bake 10 – 12 minutes.  Remove cookies from pan while still quite warm or they WILL stick, cool on wire racks.  Makes about 2 dozen.

Initial thoughts on "Friend with Benefits"

First off, it's not my title. It's Pastor Mark's, so if you take issue with it, direct it at him. If you love it, I can accept no laud for that which is not my own.

I haven't read the chapter yet in "Real Marriage", but as the first two weeks' sermons were nearly identical to their corresponding chapters, I'm feeling pretty certain my initial impressions won't vary much post-reading.  Pastor Mark talked about the necessity of friendship in a marriage today.  This sermon, for me, was akin to him pressing his index finger deep into a purple, swollen, hot to the touch bruise. It HURT.  A lot.  It's hard to sit and listen to sermons on marriage, particularly when this is the issue that has so long caused such longing.  

He described friendship as being so much deeper than we often describe or desire in today's culture.  Essentially, we have many acquaintances (or casual friends) in our lives. We're friendly with them, so we call them friends.  We only have a few true friends.  Not to say others aren't true, but we only can admit a few into that nearest, deepest, most trusted realm.  Jesus had three: Peter, James, John.  They were considered his closest friends, of which it's arguable he had ONE best friend.  Crowds that knew him, 12 that had close personal admittance, three that were the inner circle. 

I want to be married.  For me, there's a variety of reasons.  I don't want to be celibate for life (yes, mother, I DID just post that for the world to see), I want to have children, I want to be a loving, supportive, encouraging wife, I want to come alongside him in ministry so we can accomplish more together than we could as individuals...  But perhaps my most consistent and deepest longing is for friendship.  Intimate, personal, deep, fully trusting, sometimes it hurts (but it's worth it) friendship!  In Song of Solomon 5:16 Solomon's bride calls him her lover, her friend.  Even in the old testament this was sough after in a marriage based on love.  Martin Luther, who by all accounts didn't even LIKE his bride, grew to cherish her and thereby love her as his dearest and best friend.  I won't lie, I yearn for a best friend. I have since I was young, and have rarely felt the role fulfilled. As an adult, I've yearned for this in the context of marriage.  No female friend, no matter how close, has the capability of filling this need for friendship. It is a specific, one (as yet future) man's role to be filled. 

Upon sharing this with my married friends today the immediate response was something to the effect of "that's not very common in marriage".  I was hurt and offended somewhat frustrated by this. WHY do married people feel the need to tear down marriage?  I'm single. It's what I desire.  It's a GODLY desire.  Why piss on that?  ('scuse the french, mumsy!)  God created humans for relationship, specifically for marriage (hello, read Genesis 1-2 if you don't believe me).  My response to them and to all marrieds that say this is "you're right, marriage is hard. It isn't all butterflies and rainbows. I've watched enough couples struggle to know it's not always easy, and I'll struggle too if I get married.  It's still WORTH IT."  I know there will be ups and downs.  But you're in them together, not apart.  That's key to me.  God loves marriage and I think he watches over it and protects it when we call on Him.  He wants to redeem marriage more than anyone. He CREATED IT!  

Please, married friends, don't degrade or talk down about marriage to your single friends...or to your married friends.  Marriage isn't always easy; please be honest about that.  Just use constructive ideas and language.  "It's hard work, but God's gracious to us..."  "It's WORTH the effort."  "We are two sinners united in one flesh, but God's at work redeeming us and our marriage."  I'm not asking you to put aside, hide, or trivialize the struggles, but please, please, pleeeeease enough with tearing it down.  It's not helpful, affirming, or gospel-oriented.  

It IS hard to be single when my desire is for a best friend.  And "just a friend" no matter how close is not what I mean.  I want that implicit trust, oneness, closeness.  I'm willing to work, and to trust God and pray and seek wise counsel when needed.  I know it's hard, but I'm willing.  To me, a best friend is worth it.  

I'll now step down off my soap box and share a couple ideas Mark talked about in the sermon today that were of note to me.  

He defined friendship as it should look in marriage.  He had scripture for each letter, but I missed jotting some of them down:

F - fruitful

R - reciprocal

I - intimate

E - enjoy

N - needed

D - devoted

S - sanctifying

Seriously, that last one, it's a hard one.  I think we all like to think of marriage as being the FRIEND part, but it's also sanctifying.  It's two sinners, living as one in a fallen world. It WILL get messy at times, but IT'S. WORTH. IT.  Seriously, what that sanctifies isn't hard, but worth it?  Sanctification is for our HOLINESS, not our HAPPINESS.  But I truly believe and agree with Mark that we can find happiness in our holiness as we draw nearer to Christ. 

Last note, and something worth meditating on and striving to live out as a single: 

1. Be friends (not just acquaintances) with Jesus.

2. Date someone who is a friend (not just an acquaintance) of Jesus.

3. Be friends with one another. 

Worship in Community: Prayer and Singing

I should be in bed right now. I should be asleep. Instead I'm strangely awake. I could go for another couple hours, but I know I'll loathe my decision in the morning.

God's really been working actively in my heart over a very short period of time.  The outcome is that I feel incredibly close to him right now.  Praise God!!  I feel incredibly drawn to pray: throughout the day, for myself, for others, for peace, for discernment, for many things! I was driving home tonight, flipping through the radio stations, feeling that I should pray, but trying to just relax and wind down.  After fighting internally for a moment, I shut off the radio and began talking to God about community group, lifting up prayers from there, praising Him for the conversation and truth that was spoken, thanking Him for putting me there...  It just flowed.  Prayer for me just does. not. flow.  It does not come naturally.  I feel like I develop a speech impediment and my IQ drops significantly and my vocabulary goes from above average to toddler-esque.  Not tonight.  It was encouraging and empowering.  Wow, God. You can even govern my prayer and give me words to pray.  Wow.  Awesome!

So that led me to meditate on His goodness.  My favorite hymn is "Be Thou My Vision".  As I was singing  this over and over for the last few minutes of my ride, it struck me how much I want this kind of prayer and worship to be part of my community life.  I don't want it to be restricted to Sunday mornings.  I don't want my times of corporate fellowship through prayer to be limited to a couple minutes here and there.  I crave this.  God can do big things through prayer, and for a borderline introvert like me, prone to isolation, it's both exciting and terrifying.

Still, I'm excited, so I'm typing this out in hopes that I will be able to sleep once I've committed it to writing and shared it.  I don't want to pass on this initial excitement.  I would love to host semi-regular gatherings to pray and sing.  I had a dear friend who did this when I was back in Athens.  I regret to say I never attended, and I've since regretted that decision to let my own fears of praying in public keep me from such a sweet time of fellowship, unity, and worship of our amazing Creator!

Tonight I'm being bold, and putting it out there.  If you play an instrument, I could sure use you to join me in this venture.  If you're at all interested in coming together for some worship through song and prayer, please e-mail me and we'll figure out a time!  I'm not sure how often...maybe just monthly to start?

I could go on and on, but I'll leave it there.  Please message me or comment if you're interested!

A commentary on marriage from one wiser than me

First the verses: 

"Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.  The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man."  For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.  The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame." 

Genesis 2:22-25

And now from The Wycliffe Bible Commentary:

The inspired author indirectly reveals man's natural loneliness and lack of full satisfaction.  Though much had been done for him, yet he was conscious of a lack.  The Creator had not finished.  He had plans for providing a companion who would satisfy the unfulfilled yearnings of man's heart.  Created for fellowship and companionship, man could enter into the full life only as he might share love, trust, and devotion in the intimate circle of the family relationship.  Jehovah made it possible for man to have "an help meet for him."  Literally, a help answering to him, or, one who answers.  she was to be one who could share man's responsibilities, respond to his nature with understanding and love, and wholeheartedly co-operate with him in working out the plan of God. 

I love this understanding of a man’s need and by definition a woman’s role and heart’s desire! Wow.  I feel this desire so keenly these days.  It's affirming to know it's hard-wired from creation.  Though it's not perfect now as it was for Adam and Eve in the pre-fall Eden, the Bible never indicates that God veers from this plan for men and women. 

On prayer.

I've been convicted as of late to pray boldly, clearly, and with intentionality.  One of the ways I have applied this is to really LISTEN to what my friends are saying. When they mention a struggle, I mentally note to pray for them. Sometimes I tell them. I feel like sometimes there's a stigma about offering to pray for something that isn't specifically presented as a prayer request.  Why?

What's wrong with our culture that we're so reticent to share our hearts? Share our struggles? And honestly pray for one another.

Sure, we say we'll pray for people.  When it's specifically requested, or it's so obvious we feel we must.  At this juncture it seems as though two things often happen (and I speak from personal experience, sadly enough):

1. I half-heartedly pray for them in that moment or a moment later (specifically if I'm chatting online or in some other way not in front of them where praying would not feel awkward for me).

2. I intend to pray but completely forget only to feel a variance of a twinge to a full blown gut dropping sorrow when I see the same person again and realize I haven't prayed for them and toss up a quick prayer so I can say I fulfilled my commitment.

Wow, right?

I want to have a rich prayer life.  I want to see the change in my friends to godly men and godly women.

Okay, I'm exhausted and full and needing sleep.  More to come.

Embrace Messy Art!

I loooove, love, love Pinterest for ideas!! This picture Embrace Messy Hair was my inspiration. I just couldn't help but NEED this in my bathroom!  I had to make my own, but how?

I had picked up a piece of screen fabric at Ikea for a dollar. I couldn't help myself. It was only a dollar!  So then I had almost half a gallon of cream paint left over from painting my bathroom... I'm seeing a plan coming together!

Let's let the pictures say the rest:

 I admit the second A got away from me...but I'm embracing the messy art and loving it! 

What a perfect finish to my bathroom!!! 

I was having so much fun, and I had one painted branch left...and some screen...and a favorite/life verse (2 Corinthians 12:8-9) 

I'm planning to add a drawer pull at the top instead of a nail.  I also had to sew the branch on... I glued it, but it kind of sagged a bit, so I used some matching red thread and voila! 10 minute art project! I love it!  So random, so me!  It makes me smile when I go in/out the door. Such a great reminder! 

Free (or almost free) decorating!

I've put my budget toward big ticket items such as a couch, chair, carpet cleaning, a side board... That left me wanting to save on decorating.  No problem, I thought. I have one project that won't be "cheap" but isn't too costly: a photo wall.  I got tea light wall sconces 4 for $20! Beautiful!   I had a (very) few things from my previous apartments, but it still felt pretty bare.  

On a whim I bought a scrap of screen fabric.  It was only a dollar. I couldn't resist. I also picked up a perfect condition 8x10 wooden frame for $2 in the as-is section. No idea how I'm going to put these together, but I'm thinking I'll wrap the mat in screen fabric for a bit of texture? 

I looked all over (okay, 3 stores) for the right height of sticks to add some height to my mantle.  No luck.  Okay, really?  There was a big ice storm...there's probably a ton lying in the snow around the condo.  I picked up some paint at Fred Meyer for a whopping $1.39 to darken the red on the pot in my kitchen. 

The pot was a success!  Many thanks to my dad who built the shelf! I bought the grass on the same whim from Ikea. 

So now I have most of a bottle of dark red paint left...and twigs all over my kitchen floor... Hmm.... Let's do an experiment... Wax paper, twigs, acrylic paint, and an artist brush...  Yep, this could work! 

It took some playing around to figure out a container for them.  In the mean time I tried a clear vase with rocks -- hmmm...a bit too tall... beans?  Not quite...but I think I'm on to something!  I had red beans in my cupboard.  Add a grocery bag to take up some space so the jar will look full, aaaand add a thrifted ribbon...voila!  Finally, add in a print my sister gave me for my birthday and my AWESOME $2 frame...Mantle complete!! 

Simple and it only cost me $12 (including the sconces!)

Now back to the screen... I had an oversized frame I was planning to return since it didn't work where I thought it would. It was a heck of a deal, though, only $13 for a solid wood, oversized frame... Hmm... Screen fabric....oversized frame that would work well in my bathroom... Bathroom paint... Pinterest obsession?  I'm feeling an art project coming on! 

I'm slightly obsessed with this http://pinterest.com/pin/14777504996911368/ print.  I loooove it! I need the reminder!  

So I decided to take on my own version!  I LOOOOVE IT!  

Then I decided why stop there? I have some left over....and one red branch that didn't work in the vase....hmm....  Yep. Love. Again. I love the imperfection of it! 

So, all in all, it's really coming together!  ON A BUDGET!  I got this awesome voucher from Spotted Fox (like groupon or dealmobs): Pay $49 for $200 worth of merchandise from Mor Furniture. Are you kidding me?  YES, please!  I found the perfect LITTLE chair for my wall...  Bonus: it came with an ottoman, two throw pillows, and a throw, all for $299.  After voucher that comes out to roughly $158 for ALL that! It brings the entire room together! 

Here's pics, per mom's request: 

More free decor (above):  Twigs that fell during the ice storm, spray paint (left over from another project), vase I had on hand, river rock from when I had a goldfish years ago! 

It's coming together!

I know I'm way behind on my blogging again. I figured I should at least put up some pictures of the new place!! I've still got a long list of both practical and wishlist projects, but thanks to Mom and Papa and all their hard work, it's pretty awesomely liveable just the way it is! :) 

 Love the kitchen, even if it is teeny tiny! 

There's a washer/dryer behind the dark red curtain there!

I am in LOVE with this sideboard from the Old Cannery!!! Lifetime piece. 

Thank you, Linda, for the AMAZING secretary! It really fits the room! 

Aaand thank you parents for letting me borrow your TV while you're down south! 

Getting there...just missing additional seating! 

Guest bathroom.

Master bath -- sorry the color is so funky... I'm going to paint it from (dirty) white to cream with plum accents! :) Can't wait! The colors I have so far are tan and black. 

Entry to the master bedroom. 

I LOVE my bed! My very first grown up furniture purchase years ago. 

Gabbie's highboy dresser. 

Ava's excited about Auntie's new couch! HOORAY! 

Sometime-guest room, all the time craft/sewing room! 

Oh, Sally, how I love you! And how I LOVE that organized fabric stash! 

First camera! :) 

Gabbie's old desk, then mom's...now MINE! :D 

Moving Day: Hard work, pizza, and 4 month old kiwi fruit

Moving day dawned crisp and clear.  It had been raining all week, so I was thanking God when I woke up to see blue skies peaking out at me from behind the clouds.  We picked up a U-Haul and met the motley moving crew at Sarah's to get started.

The star of the show that morning was definitely little Caleb!  He was such a good sport despite being up late the night before and having only a 5 minute nap that morning.  He was making everyone laugh and coo at him.

Once we got down to business the move went very quickly!  Chad and Lorne were the rockstars of packing the UHaul and lifting all things truly HEAVY!  I have to say, though, NOAH was quite the rockstar of moving all things slightly less HEAVY!! Seriously, this kid was IMPRESSIVE!!! He worked so hard! Even the men were impressed!  Mom repeatedly told Noah he could be done, but he just kept truckin', and told her "I just love working with you guys!"  Sarah prepared the kids to be ready to work, and they showed up ready to WORK!

I can't leave out Ava. She was so cheerful, running up and down the stairs, asking to help and carrying many, many boxes, then helping unpack and organize.  She definitely takes after her mama, auntie and Nana!  She unpacked my books and placed them all neatly on the bookshelf, then tackled the DVDs and more!

The rest of the moving crew consisted of my mom (who despite a bum knee did a TON of work), Dana (who rocks the house for helping me move, helping me unpack, helping me stay sane and also made friends with my niece!)  Seriously, Dana, Ava is still talking about her "new friend"!

Finally, Sarah, my awesome sister, made moving AND unpacking in one day possible!  We unpacked all but two boxes in one day.  She also volunteered to let me keep my stuff in her garage for 3.5 months -- no small thing!!  She encouraged me and kept me sane and provided too of the hardest working kids I've ever seen!

Oh, and she wins the prize for finding the most random moved item: a bag of FRESH kiwis!!!  Apparently they fell in when I was packing the kitchen...  She came in carrying them and just said "Ummm...?"  Yeah... YIKES!  THANKFULLY they were still mostly intact and the bag they were in contained all their leaked fluids.  Grooooss! Definitely the most random thing I've ever found after moving.